Contacts and Perspectives

Dear World,

  This week I took a big step--I got old. At least, I told my optometrist I felt old and he, a 67+ yr old, laughed at my 27 yr. old vanity.

I got contacts.

  Not really a big deal, right? Definitely not a sign of decrepitude. But, still, I've always prided myself on my 20/20 or 20/15 or whatever vision--we've got to have achievements of some kind, right?

  But that's over, now. I have these contact lenses that I wear probably 70% of the time. When I first put them in (after about 19 tries to get it into my left eye--sheesh!) and drove away from the doctor, I was happily surprised by the clarity of budding springtime leaves scores of yards away and individual pine trees on the mountainside--it wasn't a "I was blind, but now I see" moment, but more similar to those Claritin allergy medicine commercials where a cloudy film is peeled off the world and everything is just more brilliant and visible. Not a life-saver, but definitely a life-sweetener.

  Contacts. They take what is already there, enhance your already-existing abilities, and create a sharper picture that allows you to better understand and enjoy the world around you. They do take maintenance and care, and sometimes only for slight vision improvement, but it is better, and sometimes that little bit makes all the difference.

It changes your perspective on the world. On the life you are living.

  We each have "contacts" moments in our lives. Things that change our perspective. Things that sharpen the view and give more vibrancy, clarity, or comprehension to us. Things that don't necessarily change reality, but enhance our grasp of reality.

You don't always need and eye-opener; sometimes just an eye-sharpener will do.

  This isn't the best post to include this on, but thinking about life perspectives and such--as I did for this post--originated in thoughts regarding a dear friend of mine who's had plenty of opportunity to gain a truer perspective and who's put in the effort and maintenance a clearer view demands. She inspires me to tune up the way I approach life--to be more like her.

  Bonsai, next month, will have battled breast (and then bone, and then brain, and then spine) cancer for two years. Her toddler and baby have now sprouted into one precocious five year-old and one tenacious three year-old. When she was given the "less-than six months" diagnosis, she and her husband moved their kids from their Indiana home back to Utah to spend time with family--and I was blessed enough to live nearby. I've been able to have some wonderful moments with her and to pray in gratitude as those short six months grew into almost nine months of relative health and mobility.

 Now doctors are telling her that her window is closer to four weeks.

  There have be so many blessings. There have been so many moments to be grateful for. So many memories made. There have also been so many hard times. So many challenges. So many "lasts" and unknowns. And during it all I've had the opportunity to see how Bonsai has taken this monsoon and found a perspective of clarity. She's taken moments to teach me what it means to be a family forever, to continue being a mom even if she isn't picking up her future teenage kids' dirty laundry. She's clarified what it means to have an eternal marriage, to parent together even when your spouse is on the other side of the veil of mortality that separates this world and the next. She's taught me to love in the moment and to have patience with those around you and yourself.

  It's times like this when I'd love to be a writer that can say something profound, that can really share something beautiful and striking through words, something that actually coveys what I feel about another human being. To write something that gives tribute to another beautiful soul. But hopefully you each have experiences to draw on that illuminate the clarity I've gained through this friendship that will last though eternity, either here though a miracle or spanning the boundaries that heaven draws.

  Thanks, Bonsai. I look forward to more fun and memories in the weeks and months to come, and also the deeper memories and experiences to be made in the following decades and eons.

A new hobby-job

I've never been a writer. Not really.

I mean, I've written a lot. That's unavoidable with a bachelor's degree in History and a master's degree in English. Lots of words from my brain have made it into black-and-white and been read by others. And I guess I have this blog, and a journal, and lots of emails, so yes, I do write. But I'm not a writer.

Now writing is my job.

It's not as dramatic as I've made it sound (like most things in my life). I've taken on a 4-8 hour a week commitment to concoct creative, short passages about any topic under the Humanities sun, accompanied by half a dozen intellectually challenging questions with explanations--I write the verbal reasoning (now known as the Critical Analysis and Reasoning) section of an MCAT practice test.

I really like having a creative outlet that pushes me. And it keeps me searching for new information--I've learned about national holidays, animation computer programs, MoMA art exhibits (like the Rain Room by rAndom [sic] International), and Toni Morrison, to name a few. And I figure the job fits me well, seeing as how standardized tests are something I am reasonably good at.

But creativity--it is stretching my figurative muscles right now. Do any of you know of cool and happening things regarding (but not limited to) Architecture, Art, Dance, Ethics, Literature, Music, Philosophy, Popular Culture, Religion, Theater, or Studies of Diverse Cultures? Or better yet, places to read where I will run across such things? My Facebook feed isn't quite at this level yet :)

It feels good to use my hard-earned academic degrees to accomplish something--and I still get to be at home with my two darling girls. Life does't get much better than that.

So, higher-brow sources to learn about cool new things? Any leads? I'm seeking Muses to guide me as I fit into this new cap in my collection: Lauran, the writer.

Can't Buy Me Love

February, the month of love, just ended last night. And, although my thoughts right now are not as philosophical as my musings from last Valentine's Day season, I have been thinking about love--and the parts of it I can buy. Here are just two of the many examples:

Music: Dustin and I found one another through music--singing, attending, playing, talking about, participating in, breathing music. It's been a large part of our lives pretty much since we were born. I want my two girls to also discover the breath-taking experiences that music gives...the ones you can't buy.
But, you can buy a piano.
It might be half a century old. It might be out of tune. It might have only cost a few hundreds instead of a few thousands, but it is a piano and our family is already doing our darnedest to break it in (or wear it out). That, and a neon green recorder (or "hoon" as it is known around our house) from the dollar store are instruments in making priceless music.

Outings: Family has grown more and more important to me as each year shows me how precious it really is. You can't put a price on the love I've found in marriage and mothering, but you can help it grow by spelling family as T-I-M-E and love as F-U-N. Our outings are usually pretty affordable (we are big fans of Free Zoo Day and splitting fast-food fries & shakes three ways) but the resulting memories and relationships are cherished beyond an auction-able amount. Hubby took the girls out for a daddy-daughters date this week and Rosie can't stop telling me about the crystals she saw in the university's science building and how yummy the crunchy cone was from McDonald's (after they took the paper off).

It doesn't take much--a little money properly placed can take love a long way.